At the age of 27, I found myself unmarried and pregnant. Living my life outside of my upbringing in church, I was using drugs and alcohol on a daily basis and I felt I would not bear a "normal" child. So, alone and in secrecy, I chose abortion. I remember walking into the clinic stoned and numb thinking I was doing the right thing for myself, the father (Robert) and our unborn child. I was told "it" was just tissue, that the procedure would be quick and I’d be on my way in a few hours. As I walked out the back door, birth control pills in hand, my life was never the same. The painful procedure that took only a few minutes forever changed my life, Robert’s life as well as impacting God's world. Depression and anger soon overtook me and bitterness became my best friend. I drank that poison daily. I began looking for ways to end the turmoil going on inside of me and thinking of taking my life.

No one ever tells women the pain, grief, shame, guilt, depression, anger and isolation that will be felt following abortion nor do they recognize that men suffer as well. *Abortion robs men of their God-given drive to provide, protect and procreate. Sexual addictions, such as pornography and inability to form relationships, have also been found to effect men.

It is the heart of the Lord to release from captivity those who suffer in silence from the effect of abortion. Isaiah 61:1-4 says:  The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, 2 to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, 3 and provide for those who grieve in Zion--to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor. 4 They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations. (NIV)

We see how the enemy seeks to destroy families, the lies we’ve been told and the destruction of nations. I believe that along with prayer and fasting, education is a tool we, as Christians, should use to fight these lies. I encourage everyone to search out the truth about abortion and the effects on not just the unborn child but the parents, extended family and God's world. We’re missing a whole generation already and working on the second one now!

Despite the turmoil in our lives as a result of our abortion, Robert and I eventually married. We gave our hearts to the Lord in 1994 and began to know that God was going to turn our mourning into dancing, our sorrow into joy and take our mistakes to use them for His glory. The next step for us was attending a Bible study for Post Abortion Stress through the Real Life Crisis Pregnancy Center. After completing the study, Robert and I felt that the Lord wanted to use us in helping others find the same freedom. The Lord has been faithful to us and our marriage has survived abortion. God is restoring what the enemy tried to take and is healing Robert and I as well as many others from the scars left by abortion.

Prayer and being able to share in a safe, confidential atmosphere has helped many men and women find the forgiveness and freedom in Christ Jesus. Real Life Crisis Pregnancy Center is dedicated to post abortion ministry and currently offers SaveOne Bible studies on a continual basis. SaveOne is an organization dedicated to reaching those who are suffering in silence after an abortion to help them reclaim and restore their peace of mind and self-worth. SaveOne’s Bible studies help men and women find forgiveness and freedom after abortion through God’s Word. Sheila Harper, the author and founder of SaveOne, recently appeared on The 700 Club to spread SaveOne’s mission.

You can help promote adoption and life by supporting our ministry through prayer as well as purchasing Choose Life Tags, making monthly donations to Real Life and inviting speakers into your church and church groups to help educate on the truth of abortion. Let people know there is help for them and it’s just a phone call away. In my heart I believe there are men and women sitting in our church each Sunday bound up by shame and guilt, unable to answer the call the Lord has on their lives. I know, because I have been there. We must encourage them to take the next step and allow Jesus to free them of the effects left by abortion. There is forgiveness for I John 1:9 says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." (NIV)

Our daughter would have been 16 years old this past February. Robert and I often wonder what it would be like to have a teenager in the house – the life, the love and the heartache that sometimes goes with teenagers! What joy she would have brought to her grandparents, uncles, aunts and to our church. What would Charlotte Clearice Cody have grown up to be? I love Psalm 139 because it speaks of how each of us was woven together in our mother’s womb and we are special to God. We look forward to seeing Charlotte someday in Heaven. For now, she is only a vision of what could have been, but one day we'll be together.

I am Mary Cody, newly appointed Director of Post Abortion Ministry at Real Life. I would like to say thank you to our former director, Denise Dunbeck, for all her hard, groundbreaking work. Denise has been an inspiration and dear friend to me and I am thankful for her dedication in this ministry. Denise and I along with others, will continue to work together to bring this ministry to those who are suffering. No one can minister alone.

Please email or call me to find out about the next SaveOne class through Real Life Crisis Pregnancy Center: maryc@saveone.org, roblcody@yahoo.com, 256-878-1300 or 256-582-8509. All contact is confidential. For more information on SaveOne log onto www.saveone.org. To learn more about how post abortion effects our congregations, log onto www.inourmidst.org.
There is complete healing in Jesus Christ. Psalm 40.

*There have been over 43 million abortions in the U.S. since abortion was legalized in 1973 by Roe vs. Wade.
*Currently, there are 1.3 million abortions in the U.S. annually.
*At these current rates, one out of three women in the U.S. will have one abortion by age 45.
*78% of these women report a religious affiliation.
*Men have no right to "choose" life for their unborn son or daughter.
Alan Guttmacher Inst.